A knock on my door, I woke up from a deep sleep. I grab the keys and dashed to the door to unlock it for the august visitor. I tried but couldn’t get the door opened, I lashed at the knob, checked the keyhole for any blockage, I exclaimed, “what is wrong with this door?”, “is it my detractors at work?” Or “was I doing something wrong?”, then it dawn on me I was using the wrong key, MY FAULT.
Life challenges are like the scenario I painted above, often when we are challenged, and most times we get stuck because we concentrate on other things but our faults. Rather than look at those things we are doing wrong we try to find fault in the things around us, we pass the blame to console ourselves, telling ourselves ‘we have tried our best but someone else failed us’… but this would not solve the problem.
In relationship, someone having disappointments would want to ascribe the mishaps (the break-ups) to ill-luck, misconduct of partners, ‘witches’ around, destiny, human’s untrustworthiness etc but in most case it is those little things we overlook that are actually responsible like our temper, habits, believe, disposition to life, not wearing other’s shoes etc.
In academics, failure is often the faults of lecturers, not being able to ‘settle’, the school’s set-up, some even say supernatural forces are at work but have we stopped to examine what our contributions are to these failures. Are we putting in our best or just resigning to fate. By the way, “If you haven’t discovered your own reading and assimilation habits you are likely going to find it hard to cope academically.”
In business, you find people winding up the business in just few years of starting with complains like bad economy, low profit, fetish competition and so on while they fail to look into their contribution to their failure like bad planning, over-spending, bad business judgments etc., Same goes for employee seeing the employer as the problem whereas much of it are as a result of their disposition to the work.
In whatever you do, I want you to take time out and look inward, look into what your contributions are to your present challenges, are you fuelling it or improving it? Are you the negative force or the positive force affecting yourself? Let us look inward for solutions rather than outside for people to blame and I believe the sky would just be the beginning.
By Selah May 1, 2011