7 Reasons Why You Can Be Unhappy
1. Building your happiness around someone
Often times in the name of love we lock out everyone else in our lives just to accommodate one person. This can be very dangerous as we get so addicted to such person that they become the only reason we get excited and happy. This is why some people commit suicide or go crazy after a broken relationship. Being addicted to someone is like being addicted to drugs, there would always a withdrawal syndrome when the relationship falls apart but having friends and family around would always cushion the effect.
My advice: Have a good relationship with friends and family, don’t cast them away because you have a lover or new friend that seem to understand everything about you.
2. Small things are more important than they seem
If on your way to bigger dreams you neglect things that use to matter to you, eventually when you achieve the bigger dreams, you will realize that the so-called bigger dreams were not as important as those things you sacrificed along the way. Most big dreams give illusion of absolute but believe me, nothing is absolute. For instance, if your goal was to be a millionaire after your millions, you will be thinking of billions, one dream is always replaced by another but small things like family, good health, true friends, rest, good food etc never change and when you neglect them you tend to suffer unhappiness in the end, in spite of having your big dreams.
My advice: keep your big dreams close but keep those small things closer.
3. Trusting in Men rather than God
Of truth is that God works through people but this is never a reason to build your hope around people. Men will always disappoint intentionally or unintentionally, it’s like our second nature. So when we build our hope, trust and faith around people sadness is inevitable because when disappointment comes from them, it will leave us heartbroken but if our trust is in God even when people betray us, the Joy of God would still be our strength.
My advice: See man as a vessel in the hands of God, and not man as the god of your destiny.
4. Want Vs Need
This happens when you don’t set your priorities right, you tend to be lost between what you want and what you need. Every time this happens you will have a feeling of lack and sadness but if you have your priorities right you will find out that not having what you want is not lack, it just a natural occurrence, even the richest men don’t have all they want, oftentimes not for lack of money but because those things are yet to be invented or not readily available. If your focus is on what you want then all you will keep seeing are lacks, lacks and more lacks; and that’s just sadness all around.
My advice: Get your priorities right and know that because you don’t have it now doesn’t mean you will never have it.
Most people have lost their sense of socialization; no friends, no fun time, no outings just work and alone times. Do you know that naturally, we are social “animals”, the need to socialize is as natural as sleep, breath or death, hence if we don’t, the tendency is for us to be withdrawn, lonely and sad. This is not about partying or late nights, this is about keeping people around us, sharing thoughts, ideas, moment, problems, bad times and good times.
My advice: Loneliness is a bad habit, make friends, go out, do sight seeing, visit people, have a large heart where sadness cannot hide.
6. Wrong profession
We all have our different callings, things we are naturally good at, often times we know this by the excitement we feel when we are doing things related to them. For example, some are natural helpers so they are excited by teaching, some are carers hence they are best suited for healthcare services. However because of the economic demands and the general idea of putting money first, most people have ended up in professions that are not natural to them, as such no matter how much they try, they hardly find fulfilment and happiness. I have a friend who quit practicing law to start photography, he said the sad eyes in the courtroom creeps him out but being in happy places like weddings, anniversaries etc makes him fulfilled.
My advice: Know your calling, find a field that emphasizes it and remember it is never too late to cross over. Where you find fulfilment, sooner or later you will find wealth.
7. Ungodly foundation
Our lives are in steps or phases, each phase is an extension of the one before and all woven together to form what people see when they meet us. Each step is built on foundation of faith, believe and discipline. Good foundation will bring happiness while bad foundation will bring sadness. The steps include being born, making friends, gaining admission, learning a trade, getting a job, getting married, having kids, building a home etc.
My advice: Make God the foundation of your life, let Him order your steps and if you ask me, the shortest distance to God is Jesus Christ but you are entitled to your own route, however the most important thing is to make God your foundation if you want to be happy.