Interview With a Player Part 3
This is my interview with a new friend of mine, he used to be a player, a heartbreaker and a chronic womanizer. He agreed to share some of his experiences with me and I hope we can all learn from them as well as from the few notes I took during the interview. You are welcome to the series.
Selahsomeone: Welcome back readers, let’s learn as Mr. A continues with his story. So Mr. A, what happened in the morning?
Mr. A: Okay, so I woke up to realized neither of the two sisters came to bed, I was a bit worried, not just because I thought I had lost my meal ticket but because I thought I had lost two people who truly cared about me. I thought I had waited till it was morning, though I couldn’t sleep again, in my head I was replaying all that had happened. Then I heard movements in the sitting room, I jumped off the bed, lo and behold, miss F on the couch and miss B clearing the plates in the kitchen. I was so relieved, my play acting worked, maybe not totally but ‘they are still here’. I was so happy.
Selahsomeone: Wow! Miss F must have truly loved you to have stayed.
Love can be so many things; tolerating, forgiving, understanding, protecting, caring, believing, trusting and so on but love is not foolish. Your partner may be so loving that you want to mistake him or her a fool but believe me, when you take what you have for granted, with time it becomes what you had!
Mr. A: Yes, she did and I was able to keep her till we were done with polytechnic. Miss B left that weekend but we kept in touch via letters (no mobile phones then). Everything went smooth afterwards, I was able to process miss F’s admission to same university as myself, as direct entry students, and our relationship continued until…
Selahsomeone: (cuts in) If I get you right, you still continued with miss B in spite of everything that happened, don’t you think that’s a bit to the extreme?
Mr. A: A part of me loved miss B, I maybe a player of some sort but somehow, I had this soft spot for miss B and maybe because of her innocence, i just could not leave her. Anyway, when we got to the university things changed. For being the best student at the polytechnic, my dad (things changed for him too, we had lots of money to throw around) gave me a car and my allowance moved from #500/month to #10000/month. I no longer needed anyone as my meal ticket, my dependence on miss F disappeared. She noticed this and we began to have lots of issues. She became obsessive, insecured and bittered; she practically saw faults in everything I did and how I related with other ladies. I saw another side to her but in spite of everything, one thing remained constant, she loved me and was not ready to let me go.
Selahsomeone: Change comes with its own challenges. Please continue!
There is a thin line between love and obsession. Love lets go and somehow it comes back but obsession holds on tight and somehow it eventually squeezes life out of the relationship. Are you obsessed or in love?
Mr. A: Miss B came visiting again (3years since I last saw her), now she was older and a lot bolder. When she came the sister, Miss F, insisted they both stay at her place but miss B insisted, she came to see me and was going to stay at my place.
Okay a little description of the arrangement now, miss F had a place of her own while I also had a place of my own, both single rooms but different houses (about 5km apart). Miss F usually stays at my place weekdays and goes back to her place on weekends. So when miss B insisted she was staying with me, the sister too had to come stay with me that weekend. Three of us in one room, same bed, I sleep in the middle flanked by both sisters. Like I said, miss B was a lot bolder now and would insist on putting her head my chest even with the sister beside us. At first miss F was not comfortable with it but I was able to calm her down and assured her it was nothing, after all, she was like a sister to me.
First thing Monday morning, Miss B left for Lagos and back to her school. Life continued with Miss F till the unexpected happened; somewhere along the line she got pregnant. It was unexpected, we thought we were always careful, using the safe period calculations, withdrawal method because I wouldn’t use sheaths, then salt water the morning after just in case; but somehow it happened. We delibrated about it, thought of the consequences, eventually we opted for d&c.
Selahsomeone: D&C? As in abortion? That’s to the extreme! You guys really went too far. Weren’t you scared something bad might happen? Okay, go on *taking notes*
Actions come with consequences; we want to act yet we don’t want the consequence. Life doesn’t swing that way; ask yourself, “am I prepared for what this might bring upon me?”. Trust me friend, when the chips are down, the owner of the chips goes down with it!
Mr.A. At the clinic, the doctor insisted I should stay while he performed the operation. I had never seen someone in that much pain before, she tried to stay strong but she couldn’t hold back her tears, the blood was so much, I felt faint and I just went blank. When I gained consciousness, I found myself on the hospital bed, drip hung by my side, that was when I realized, I actually passed out. She was up already, seated by my side. In spite of all the pains she just experienced, she still managed to sit by my side with love written all over her face, I felt so sorry for her, for the pain I had caused her and for passing out when she needed me most.
Selahsomeone: *Sigh* What can I say!?! Please continue.
Mr. A: After the hospital incident, we became enstranged, she became a bit withdrawn and more aggressive, till the last straw that broke the camel’s back.
Well it happened in a strange way. I had been keeping all miss B’s letters under my bed, this faithful day miss F came around and insisted she wanted to sleepover (after the pregnancy mishap, we decided we should stay apart, even on weekdays). I was invited to Law dinner (dinner and all night party) scheduled for that same night and I didn’t want to take her, so I don’t miss out on the fun, hence lied to her that the invite I got was just for one person. Without much hassle, she agreed to stay back in my house alone.
Following morning when I returned home (till today I wished I had taken her) I found my room had been turned upsidedown; miss B’s letters were scattered on my bed, my TV,video and other moveables thrashed, instantly I knew the bubble is bursted and I had lost her. Till today we have not spoken of what happened. It all ended that day; though being in the same class and because we shared same friends, we tried to maintain friendly disposition and when people tried to ask questions, we do our best to avoid giving any tangible answers.
Selahsomeone: Ugh! You lost her eventually. That was expected. You can’t eat your cake and have it, so also, lie can only sustain a relationship for a while, truth always have its way in the end. Hope that serves as lesson for you and changed you.
Mr. A: Yes, I did my best to change but then life had other ideas. In less than 2 months i started dating another lady, miss T (I met her at the law dinner, also happened to be in my class). Honestly, I believed I had learned from my relationship with miss F, I stopped writing miss B and I was so sure nothing could come between me and miss T. Miss T was that social dream girl; parties, clubbing, raves and what have you. We never missed an event together, though some I insisted we won’t attend but people came to tell me she attended without me. I wasn’t ready for any gossip to spoil the relationship, so I just ignored all the hearsays.
I met almost all her family members, and she used to take me to her uncle’s workplace (the bank). The man was very accommodating, he gave us money from time to time and advice too. I was really down with miss T, she knew how to turn the heat on; she was pretty good and made sure no unwanted aftermaths like pregnancy. However, on this faithful day, I dropped my car at the mechanics and since miss T’s place was a stroll away from my mechanic’s place, I decided to breeze in. I got to her place, the brothers were playing soccer outside, they were too engrossed to notice me and so I just went straight inside. What I saw was blinding; miss T and the supposed uncle smooching and moaning on her bed. I was confused, i couldn’t process what was happening but when it eventually dawned on me, I almost ran mad!
Selahsomeone: *laughing* sorry I can’t help it. I know it must have really pained you but that’s like God’s payback. How fast the table turns, so how did you handle it.
An adeage says, “when an evil man thinks he is done with his last evil deed, somehow repercussion starts looking for him”. Life is simple but in a complex way, the past always catches up, no matter how fast we think we can run.
Mr. A: I left for my place, not crying but obviously very sober. This was early 2004, we had mobile phones then, so she called but I didn’t pick. Next, her brothers came to my house, forgot to tell you, she had these three hefty guys for brothers and they were cultists, they came around and beat the fear of God into me and then warned me that if I ever tried to leave her again, I would be dead.
So Selahsomeone, I had to stay in the relationship. She didn’t even bother to apologize neither did she stop seeing the said uncle. At this point, I became a slave in the relationship. I couldn’t leave neither could I stay. One day she was around when miss B called (miss B somehow got my number and seriously I was so pleased to hear from her after a long while), miss T forcefully collected the phone from me, on hearing a lady’s voice at the other end, she started cursing. She ended the call and I can’t forget what happened afterwards, she gave me a destiny resetting slap (I definitely saw billions of stars with colours IPhone7 won’t be able to place) then she said “imagine that idiot telling me, you don’t know me, I took him from my sister and I don’t think I am going to give him up for you. Who is she? Talk before I sound you again?” Selahsomeone, good slap activates the brain, every word she said stuck but then I wasn’t going to let it go just like that at the same time, I wasn’t ready to die at the hands of her brothers…
To be continued