Why Do You Need People’s Approvals?
“Do you need people’s approval before you act on your burning heart desires?”
Many people have asked me this question in different forms and each of these questions come with its own peculiarity. The first question I always ask is, “who are the “people” involved?” and answers have ranged from family to acquittance.
So what I am going to try and breakdown is how much do you need people’s approval. I will divide the types of people into five and then explain
1. Family: Your family most likely don’t want you to get hurt, they want to protect you but most of all the want to protect the family name. Hence, they will most likely stop you from trying something crazy, something they are scared may bring the family name to disrepute or something they are convinced would fail.
So with family, it is often best to listen to their side of the story but don’t let them transfer their fears to you. You don’t need their approval to follow your dreams (even when there are your only source of finance) but you need to hear them out and find a way to handle their worries.
2. Friends: Friends want you guys to roll on same level, it is not about envy, it is just what friends do. Little wonder when you are doing better your circle of friends become smaller or change. So if your next step will take you out of your current friends’ level, they would probably not support you. Usually, friends won’t tell you don’t do it but they will try and show you why you can’t succeed doing it, giving examples of people who have tried and failed it at.
So with friends, just like family, you don’t need their approval but listen to all their points and take it for what it is “what you should watch out for”. Most of the fears your friends will project are real but they are not insurmountable as they have painted them.
3. Professionals in the field: These are people who are eager to get you on board. You get to here stories of how hard it was before they got to where they are and how they feel it is not impossible. Some paint scary pictures just to show you how strong they have been over the years (just to massage their own ego) while others only tell you the fun side just to alley your fears.
With these sets of people, be smart. Be sure you have made the right choice before you talk to these people because they can easily infect you with their passion or totally kill the little passion you have. However, you don’t need their approval but you need their endorsement. To be honest with you, to move up very fast, someone up there may have to hold your hand up, so on that premises you need them but not their approval to start.
4. Target market/audience: Once you are providing a solution to someone’s problem, the person doesn’t care about who you are, all the person cares about is the solution you are providing. The market/audience even though buys packaging alongside the solution but most often the solution is the cake, the packaging is just the icing.
You don’t need the approval of the market to start your business but you need to understand the need or problem you want to satisfy; you need to understand the market/audience. Gone are the days when supply creates it demand, these days you will have to identify the demand before you create what you want to supply.
5. Others: Others could be anybody for you, your pastor, your imam, your mentor, a motivational speaker etc., anyone that falls outside the first four group of people. For certain reasons you must have felt they need to give you the go ahead, but let me shock you, you owe nobody an explanation for why and how you wish to follow your dreams.
There is only one person that needs convincing and that is YOU! You need no approval from anybody to do something meaningful with your life. I always say this, “whoever loves you will eventually come to terms with who and what you are”, it is as simple as that.
You want to write, so what’s stopping you; you want to be a social media celebrity, do your thing; you want to drop out of school to follow your passion, by all means help yourself; you want to travel out to pursue your academics, may God so help you! look for scholarship abroad; you studied law but realized your passion is fashion, quit dilly-dallying and start looking for fashion school already; trust me you need no one’s approval to become who you are meant to be.
Your only limitation should be that which you have set for yourself, come on, don’t live life waiting for one command center to tell you when to jump. Check history, those who have stood out were those who have gone against the odds, even when loved ones tried to stop them from doing it they did it anyway.
This is your chance to join people who made history, don’t let “seeking approval” stop you!
So Why Do You Need People’s Approvals?… Because YOU DON’T
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