A little Nicer

A little Nicer

Being deserving of a thing is not measured by what you went through to get it but your understanding of what makes that thing precious; passion does that for people more than pain could ever do, build passion in people and not pain. – Selahsomeone

You don’t have to have all you want before you make impact in other people’s life; a smile, kind words, gentle touch, constructive criticism are few of the ways you can reach out. I know sometimes you just feel like letting out your frustrations but you don’t have to make a third (innocent person) party a victim of your outburst. Everyone has a burden, transferring yours to others would only cause a ripple effect.

Many say the world is crazy, the government is bad, our leaders are malicious but you know what I think? I think we are all a victim of our own ills. I have encountered so many difficulties in my life and to each of them has a face of someone who could have been nicer. (I hope I am making sense). A sadistic lecturer, a difficult boss, a backstabbing friend, a cheating date, an oppressing rich man/woman etc, all individuals that could have just been a little nicer but instead chose to be selfish, eccentric and egoistic like you and I often do.

It doesn’t hurt to make life comfortable for others in spite of going through a difficult time yourself. You shouldn’t delight in seeing others suffer. Because you had a rough start at your workplace or getting your degree or getting to stardom doesn’t mean you should inflict same on people coming up through you. If we go by “an eye for an eye” the whole world will soon go blind. Making it easy for people coming behind should be your topmost priority. Being deserving of a thing is not measured by what you went through to get it but your understanding of what makes that thing precious; passion does that for people more than pain could ever do, build passion in people and not pain.

You know that giggling dance you do on the inside when you read bad news about celebrities and affluent people, that’s not nice. No one deserves to be wished evil upon. You wonder why bad news sell more, well it is because deep down most of us are of the opinion that if we can’t be happy no one deserves to be happy. This has to change! We can all be a little nicer, celebrating the good in one another. Do you know that happiness can be passed on just as sadness is contagious? That is the ripple effect! Make someone happy and you will see how happy it will make you feel.

Even when you feel compelled to correct a wrong, be subtle about it, remember it doesn’t end there. Don’t ripple the waters of karma, correct with the right intentions not out of envy or vengeance. When you have to teach a lesson, let the blessings be obvious. Because you are on top today doesn’t make you a supreme being nor omnipresent, you are but a man, remember someone would fill that position in a short while… Be mindful of this and let it guide your everyday actions.

Be nicer even if it is just a little more than your usual. Go out of your way to do something for someone. Do you know the greatest feeling of satisfaction comes from knowing that you have delighted someone? Don’t argue just try it and you will experience something different.

Share this with someone you wish could be a little nicer!

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Look Closely

Look Closely

Look closely, you will find your game changer!

– @selahsomeone

Your life may seem to be in shambles, nothing seems to be working according to plans and you just want to throw in the towel and resign to fate. Or you just don’t see a way out of your current predicament and you think this is the end of everything good. I have this words for you today, “look closely!”

Look closely at your current situation, maybe some lame choices got you here but if you pay attention to what you have learned you can make better choices going forward. You can turn around your lessons into blessings, building from the pieces of what is left of you, making your experiences into a springboard, and a platform for something others can learn from. Many people have come off scenarios crazier than this and you too can but you will have to take a closer look.

I truly believe that everything that we do and everyone that we meet is put in our path for a purpose. There are no accidents; we’re all teachers – if we’re willing to pay attention to the lessons we learn, trust our positive instincts and not be afraid to take risks or wait for some miracle to come knocking at our door.
– Marla Gibbs

Look closely at what you still have in your favour and how you can make them count for something great. No matter how bad things are, there will always be some positives, it just takes a closer look to figure them out. Identity these positives and how you can use them to get your life back together; your contacts, your friends, your goodwill, your faith, your free time, the fact that you still can breathe these are few of the many positives you still have, don’t hesitate to explore them.

Sentiment some times obscure our views, so much we lose hope, we get emotional about what we have lost; heartbreaks and the time we have wasted, the passion that went unrewarded and the investments that failed to yield, all these can leave even the strongest of us shattered. But when we look beyond the grief of the moment and the remains of our disappointment, we will see the dawn that is about to break before us. It is said that when one thing ends another begins. Look closely!

There are over 7 billion people on this planet, I am sure you have not met up to 700’000 people which is far less than 1%, and you think you can’t find someone who shares your dream or a way out your current situation? Think again! Take another look at what new skills and talents you have acquired over these few years, explore them market yourself to the world that is waiting. Don’t be shy be about what you desire, people will talk, make jest of you, even rubbish your efforts but then other people will buy into it, some will finance, most will be motivated by it and eventually it will pay off.

Do Whatever It Takes

Do Whatever It Takes

Your life, with all its ups and downs, has molded you for the greater good. Your life has been exactly what it needed to be. Don’t think you’ve lost time. It took each and every situation you have encountered to bring you to the current moment. And every moment of your life, including this one right now, is a fresh start. If you have the courage to admit when you’re scared, the ability to laugh even as you cry, the nerve to speak up even if your voice is shaking, the confidence to ask for help when you need it, and the wisdom to take it when it’s offered, then you have everything you need to get yourself to a better place.

Ordinary people choose the way of I cannot do it; successful people choose the way of I can do it. I think it is time for us to start giving certain words their proper meaning. An example is the word “impossible”. Impossible doesn’t mean it cannot be done, it only means it is yet to be accomplished. Until this is done, man will continually live in the illusion of inability and hopelessness. Provoke your inner energy; Challenge yourself and you will achieve amazing things. Be your biggest competitor – challenge yourself each day to be better than you were yesterday. A dream doesn’t become reality through magic; it takes hard work.

Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan Press On! has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race. People who lack the clarity, courage, or determination to follow their own dreams will often find ways to discourage yours. When you change for the better, the people around you will be inspired to change also….but only after doing their best to make you stop. Live your truth and don’t EVER stop.

Whatever you do, do with determination. You have one life to live; do your work with passion and give your best. Whether you want to be a chef, doctor, actor, or a mother, be passionate to get the best result. Keep your dreams alive. Understand to achieve anything requires faith and belief in yourself, vision, hard work, determination, and dedication. Remember all things are possible for those who believe. You’ve done it before and you can do it now. See the positive possibilities. Redirect the substantial energy of your frustration and turn it into positive, effective, unstoppable determination.

You cannot let a fear of failure or a fear of comparison or a fear of judgment stop you from doing the things that will make you great. You cannot succeed without the risk of failure. You cannot have a voice without the risk of criticism. You cannot love without the risk of loss. You must take these risks. I just got one last thing; I urge all of you, all of you, to enjoy your life, the precious moments you have. Nothing great could be accomplished without enthusiasm, to keep your dreams alive in spite of problems whatever you have.


Quote References

  • Spencer Chapman
  • Vivek Anandhan
  • Andrew Effiong
  • Mohammed Sekouty
  • Kaoru Shinmon
  • Albert Iyangbe
  • Calvin Coolidge
  • Steve Maraboli
  • Alia Bhatt
  • Ralph Marston
  • Gail Devers
  • Charlie Day
  • Jim Valvano

To live without a dream

*To live without a dream*

I have lived in misery before. Not because of karma but because of lack of understanding. Day in and day out walking the tightrope of a mundane existence. Merely existing and nothing more. I think this defines what I went through “To live without a dream”.

Let me tell you something. There is no nobility in poverty. I’ve been a rich man, and I’ve been poor man. And I choose rich every … time. Cause, At least as a rich man, when I have to face my problems, I show up in the back of a limo wearing a $2000 suit …and $40,000 gold …’ watch! Now, if anyone here thinks I’m superficial or materialistic. Go get a job at … McDonald’s, because that’s where you … belong!

– The Wolf of Wall Street – Leonardo DiCaprio Speech

Not knowing all the while I was only sleepwalking, not living. The road to hell is plagued with misunderstanding after misunderstanding, a fortune I wish on no man. My road, my mind resembled a rickety street full of potholes at this time. All because I all too well knew what it was, like To live without a dream.

Paradise can resemble hell when one has no dream in heart. Nothing to wake up to, no sense of urgency about life. An idle mind, one without a desire to aspire to anything worthwhile. To live without a dream, makes the heart unworthy of the air we breathe. The only logical recourse to be taken, is to set your sights high and give your heart a reason to beat.

“Listen, and take my advice,” she urges. “Don’t overlook the money part of it (life), I’ve been poor and I’ve been rich. Rich is better!” – Fanny Brice,

By all means, dream. Think the best for yourself, act on those thoughts and for all those around you let them feel your impact. For all those with a vision, imagine what it would be like, To live without a dream! Push to achieve your greatness and you will inspire greatness in the others. Let the passion that pushes you to excel, be heard, let your stories be told beyond the reaches of your world and even after you are long gone your name will continue to live on.

How to Bring Your Dreams to Life

How to Bring Your Dreams to Life

There is nothing quite as empowering as the moment you realize you have reached your dreams.

Sometimes we can allow our excuses and self-limiting beliefs to prevent us from setting our dreams and goals as high as we truly desire in our hearts. There are hundreds of reasons we can tell ourselves about why we will never actually achieve what it is we are yearning for. It could be we feel we don’t have the time, money, strength, or support. Perhaps we believe we aren’t smart enough, talented enough, or good enough to have what we dream about. Maybe it’s because we are overwhelmed, or we believe our dream is an impossible undertaking.

When we live life believing we can’t reach our goals, we will prove ourselves right every time. Not only can we lose that sense of hope and passion, over time we may stop dreaming altogether.
The truth is we are all deserving of success and happiness. We are meant to live fully and experience what life has to offer. When we stay on the journey of pursuing our dreams and goals, we receive opportunities to learn valuable life lessons that help us see anything is possible.

Years ago, I dreamed of doing work in the world that would help empower others to believe in who they are. I knew and felt firsthand how debilitating it is to not believe in yourself. I wanted to somehow help others see their potential and true essence. I started out with a desire to create a resource that parents and educators could use to help instill a sense of empowerment in children. That was my initial goal. It turned out that this dream involved countless goals. Over the course of nine years I published eleven books with the intention, the messages would resonate and help others believe in themselves. Each of these projects was an enormous undertaking. The creative process involved many months of dedication and patience. Most of the projects took well over a year to create. I had to meet thousands of small goals on the journey to reach my original dream.

I had no idea how much time, effort, and perseverance it would require to reach my initial vision. I’m pretty sure if I had known it all before I put my dream in motion, I would have been too overwhelmed to take that first step. When we look at all of the steps and unknowns involved in reaching our dream, we can very quickly lose focus. The bigger the dream, the more daunting it can feel. Often this feeling of ‘overwhelm’ can prevent us from ever taking that initial step.

Over time, I have come to see that my life has been enriched because I have pursued my dreams and goals. Having the willingness to consistently show up and take a step forward is what has helped me truly believe in myself.

7 Proven Strategies To Transform Your Dreams And Goals Into Reality

Here are the 7 proven strategies I utilize to transform my dreams and goals into reality.

Strategy #1
Have fun setting your goals. Imagine how you want to feel when you reach them. Step into that feeling as though it was already a reality. Visualization is a powerful tool to help you know where you are headed. When we know where we are headed, it is easier to trust our instincts and stay on our path that’s aligned with our truth.

Remember to make your dreams and goals BIG, and create visual reminders of what they are. Keep those reminders close by. You will need them when you hit your stopping place and need to be reminded ‘why’ you started out and ‘why’ you don’t want to quit.

Strategy #2
Focus on taking baby steps in the direction of a goal. Instead of worrying about how many steps it will take, give yourself permission to simply take one step at a time.

Strategy #3
Write your goals down. Start with a monthly plan for what you want to focus on. Then create a weekly and daily snapshot of what you will work on — make sure your plan is realistic and attainable.
When you move all of the details from your mind onto paper (or computer), you end up spending less time overthinking and worrying about all of the many tasks and projects you have to do. Spend a bit of time each month downloading your game plan. Then instead of wasting a whole bunch of time fretting, you can use that time to actually get stuff done.

Strategy #4
Commit to allotting some time each day where you ‘laser focus’ in on completing one small task related to your weekly or monthly game plan. Consistency is key. When we spend too much time looking at the big picture, we can get overwhelmed and forget where to start. Know it is okay just focus on the one small thing at a time. Dream creation is a journey, not a race.

Strategy #5
Talk about your dreams with the special people in your life to create lots of energy around what it is you are doing. When you keep your dreams hidden, it is way easier to leave them in the dark and never bring them to light. When we have people behind us who know what our big dreams are, they become our support team. They are the ones we turn to when the journey gets discouraging and we need people we trust to remind us ‘why’ we ever started in the first place.

Strategy #6
The road to reaching our dreams is often bumpy — that’s normal, it’s not meant to be smooth and overly easy. The bumps are where all of our rich learning and opportunities exist. We may question ourselves (often) and we may feel vulnerable and discouraged. We may even be tempted to work ourselves to the point of burnout to try to combat all that is hard and uncomfortable.
When the journey feels overwhelming, that’s usually the first sign we need to take some time out for ourselves. Make a serious pact with yourself to NOT become so laser focused that you lose your joy in the journey.
Regular self-care is a mandatory part of bringing your dreams to life. Know you can take regular breaks to regroup and recharge and you won’t actually get behind. Recharging your batteries gives you a renewed sense of energy and passion you can put to good use. We can hit the restart button at anytime — a much better alternative than quitting or losing our faith in the dream itself.

Strategy #7
Remember to celebrate the achievement of each mini-goal along the way. This feeling of excitement and gratitude will create the momentum and confidence to help you feel like you will reach your BIG dream. Remind yourself often that turning your dreams into reality is not a race — it is a journey. Celebrate and enjoy your journey as much as possible, and above all be kind to yourself through it — you will thank yourself later.

A couple years ago, I had the opportunity to be in the same room with five of the children who inspired the characters in my children’s empowerment books. It was a surreal experience. The children were gathered together to take part in an esteem-building workshop. The books I created, that they inspired, were resources in the program. In that moment, I suddenly realized I had actually reached my dream. It became very apparent to me then that the journey of reaching our dreams is the most memorable part — so enjoy each step as much as possible and make your dreams as big as your heart desires.

On the journey to reach the goals you set, you build yourself up. When you experience what you are capable of first hand, you continue to create dreams that will ensure a full, happy, and satisfying life journey. When you turn your ‘impossibles’ around, it has a way of opening up the world and allowing you to see your limitless potential.

This is an adapted article from Emily Madill’s book, ‘Fall In Love With Your Life, One Week at a Time’ .

Words Nobody Wants To Hear

Words Nobody Wants To Hear

So you probably don’t want to read this, if so then it is time to choose another article. But if you are ready for some hard truth then this is the article you have been looking for. So here we go:

Life is just what you make of it, the quality of efforts you put in will determine what you get out of life. Note the word “quality“! It is not hard work that makes way for success but smart work. You have to identify first which direction you want to go before you start making conscious efforts in that direction. You will see people running from one end to another like headless chickens all in the name of hard work and at the end of the day they will have nothing to show for it. Quality input is what it takes to have a first class product. Quality over quantity any day. Quality is like having depth, roots, just like with trees the deeper the roots the higher the chance of survival. When you have the depth then you can start thinking of producing more branches. Read Jordan rule

In the laziness of man, we have made so many feel good phrases to justify our idleness such as money is not everything, happiness is free, best things in life are free, I can’t fight destiny etc. These are all feel good phrases and honestly, holding on to them would only make you feel less responsible for yourself. Money is as essential as breathing, I understand we won’t all have it on the same scale but at least getting to the comfortable level is important. Nothing is free, whatever you have somehow you or someone or something paid for it. So get off your lazy behind and earn some comfort for yourself and people who depend on you.

There is nothing special about you! Yes and I mean it. You have a head, two arms and two legs just like everyone else. You are just like anyone you know, you have seen or read about. So you can try and become like the successful ones or end up like the unsuccessful ones, it is absolutely your choice. But because you are like everyone else, you can be whatever you chose to be, it means you can choose any path you desire. You might have gifts, talents, consciousness, intuition or passion that may give you edge over others or guide which footsteps to follow but whatever you make of your life will determine where you will end up. Don’t feel too special that you start hoping things would just change overnight, you would have to work for it like everyone else and if you decide not to, then you will end where most people who chose that ended.

Fairytale life do not exist. I want to believe in fairytales too but reality would just not allow that. Miracles, lucks, fortunes are products of positioning. You will have to seek if you want to find! No fairy godmother is going to pop up in your room at 23:59hrs asking you to make a wish before 00:00hrs. You will have to go after your wishes with all you have got. You will have to do your research if you want to be well positioned, you will have to pay for lies if you hope to find the truth, you will have to meet the wrong people on your way to finding the right ones. You will endure failures till you find success. Midnight wishes will not happen, most prayers will not be answered, most dreams will die before you even wake up, most ideas will not even leave the paper you jot them. All these may seem mean but trust me they are designed just to ensure only those who are ready to go the extra mile get the extraordinary.

Motivational speakers would want to give you the impression that having dreams is all that matters, this is a lie! There are lots of dreamers in the world yet few achievers. It is not good enough to have dreams, you must be willing and able to bring them to life through consistent and coordinated actions. People want to sit back and read success stories, and at the end of it, they want to claim it without working for it. Nope! It doesn’t work that way. You will have to get up and swing to action; set goals and achieve them, approach people for assistance and some will turn you down but you won’t stop, you will hit brick walls and you will still have to find a way to push through it. It is not about the size of your dream but about how far you are willing to go to see your dream come to live. 

What is lost can never be regained; opportunities, trust, first impression and so on. I believe in second chance but nothing beats making the best of your first chance. No matter how well you have repented it cannot be the same. Opportunity lost can’t be regained, you can get something better, something similar but not same thing and if against all odds you get same thing it can’t be same time (time is irreversible). And when you let people down, it is never going to be the same again. The import of this is that you should take nothing for granted, do everything possible to give your best at the first time of asking; in life choices, creating impressions, relationships, career, business, loyalty and in friendship. 

“New year new resolution”, trust me that’s just another crap we tell ourselves to delay/postpone what must be done. You don’t have to wait till a new day, a Monday or a new year to start something new. In fact you are better-off starting immediately you realize what must be done. People who have changed the course of history didn’t wait till Monday to start, they started the moment they realized what must be done. Most ideas die because we delay starting, that wait kills our morale, passion and burning desire to achieve results. ” Delay is deadly” when it comes to starting something new and changing your game. If you have a dream start as soon as you wake up, no delays.

Lastly, you have to know that no emotion or feeling or situation is forever. Whatever it is, good or bad, happiness or sadness it is ephemeral. Your situation is only for a while, it could either get better or worse depending on whether you choose to do something or nothing. If you are happy now, there will be time you would be unhappy, if you are so much in love now a time will come when you will question your feelings, it is normal, it is the way life is wired. It is now left to you to choose what your reactions will be on those gloomy days when you are not so sure of who you are or what you want. Don’t beat yourself up over situations you couldn’t have prevented, don’t be too hard on yourself for things you can’t change, but if there is/are something(s) you can do to make life better for yourself never hesitate to do it/them. 

Life is so worth holding on to especially when you remember you don’t know what lies at the other side, though our life is borrowed, without a doubt we will all pay back that debt. So dear, make your life count for something, let your living be felt even by the generations yet to come. Play, work, have fun, get serious, make money, get fame, take risks, stay safe and above all touch lives!

You Have All You Need To Start

You Have All You Need To Start

If you have the passion, if you have a dream, if you have the Will, if you have You, then you have all you need to start! – Selahsomeone

A little bird looked at its mother and said, “mama when I grow big like you, I will fly to the top of the highest mountain and enjoy the coolest breeze of all”.

The mother bird smiled and replied, ” my little angel, if your dream is to one day enjoy the coolest breeze of all on the top of the highest mountain, then you will have to start your flying practice now”.

The little bird stretched its little wings, as if to say mum can’t you see, then said, “mum but you know i can’t fly that high yet, i am just a little bird”.

The mother bird replied, “I know you can’t fly that high yet but then if you want to someday fly that high you will have to start the lessons and attempts now”.

The mother bird went on; do you have wings?

The little bird answered, “Yes I do but they are pretty short!”

The mother probed further, do you have the Will and passion to drive your dream?

The little bird answered, “Yes i do but my friends said i need more than that”.

The mother bird shook her head, finally she asked, do you believe in yourself?

The little bird now not really sure of what to say, murmured, “Yes but i think i need to wait till i have big wings to carry me”.

The mother bird came closer and wrapped her wings around the little bird in a way to comfort and encourage her little baby. She then said, ” my baby, you have all you need to fly to the highest mountain, maybe you can’t fly that high right now but trust me, to grow big you have to start small. You have wings irrespective of the size, you have the Will and you have the dream to follow; that’s all you need. It is good to aim for the highest mountain, to set goals worthy of the future but it is wise to know that to fly to the highest mountain you will have to start from jumping ridges.


Do not despise these small beginnings, for the LORD rejoices to see the work begin… Zechariah 4:10

Many of us are like the little bird, we have big dreams and aspirations, some even have blueprints of where they want to be but the mistake most of us make is that we forget growing big means we have to start small.

Take for instance;

Steve Jobs all he had were his idea, few friends who shared his vision and a garage to start with

Arnold Schwarzenegger all he had was his body and a terrible English accent

Larry Page and Sergey Brin could not even afford the rent of a garage when they started, they had to wait like a year to get that yet that didn’t stop them from starting Google.

We would always have excuses why we cannot start living our dreams but when we understand the beauty of starting small we will understand that all these excuses don’t hold water; be it finance, personnel, experience, economic situation and so on, they are all things we can pick up along the way. The most important thing is that we start.

Know this, no matter how big and beautiful your dream is, if it cannot not be broken down into achievable pieces, stages, goals or targets then the dream is already self defeated.

Starting small presupposes that you get better per stage at doing something while growing at the same time. For instance, if your dream is become the President of a country, you will have to have achievable pieces or stages like get a political party, establish yourself in the party, try a couple of positions within the party, create big impression in your community, state and country, go for a state position then finally your dream, the presidency. You don’t just hope that you will wake up someday and become the president. Every dream should be capable of being broken down.

The beauty of starting small is that you are able to grow with your dream; along the way you learn from your mistakes, you adjust to reality, you grow into character and finally surpass your initial dream. However, if you are waiting to start big, most likely you won’t even start and when by a stroke of luck you are able to start, if you fail there would definitely be no way back.

You have a dream capable of being broken down, you have the passion, you have the will and you have You, that’s about all you need to start. Take the first step and don’t look back, start from the least and work your way to the top, set goals, have targets and plan stages, and whatever other things you think you need would find their way to you. Start flying now and very soon you will find your way to the highest mountain where the breeze is coolest.