Tag: Respect

Posted in Author Onome, Relationship

Relationship Tips From Onomewrites

Posted on by selahsomeonetotalkto

Relationship Tips From Onomewrites

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#OnomeWrites is a compilation of thoughts on relationship that is designed to guide your choice of life partner, to help foster your existing relationship and to light up dark areas in marriages. For clarification and personal counseling you can email me at  onomewrites@gmail.com.

Stay blessed.

Omodara Onome
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A good relationship consists of two people who are ready to learn from each other. Don’t be rigid, it is a partnership that’s why he or she is called a life partner and your partner’s opinions should count, if you want the best for your relationship.

Feelings could be deceptive and often times temporary but true love stands the test of time. Time reveals that which is true. Give yourself time before you take decision and when it comes to love never be in a rush!

In an ideal relationship there is a need to respect and value each other’s opinion! Your partner’s opinion should matter to you so that you can agree.

True love communicates. Communication is a vital key in any relationship. If you’re not doing that something is wrong.  Fight to resolve differences  but never estrange communication!

If you have to beg for affection and attention then something is wrong in your relationship. Fix it before you tie the knots. You are both worth more, don’t manage into marriage.

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It’s okay to have fantasies but it should never be a yardstick, there’s no perfect person but people could be better with lots of love & encouragement.

If she is not ready to build your dreams with you then she’s not worth it&if he’s not ready to help you in making your good dreams a reality then you need to do a rethink. Love is all about working & celebrating successes! Dreams should be built together cos it takes two sane mind to tango!

If you want to have a good relationship, you need to desire and then resolve in your heart to give as much as you expect no matter what it takes!

As a lady, If he doesn’t respect you now, then you need to think twice before you tie the knots. Raise your self-esteem, you are not to be messed with, you are to be celebrated.

We don’t attract what we want but who we are, if u want to get a better mate then be a better person. You attract who you are.

Selfishness is anti-relationship. If you want to make your  relationship work avoid self-centeredness! The word is not “mine” but “ours” if the relationship is to work. Compromises, sacrifices and dialogs are what relationship thrives on.

One of God’s greatest gift is an unanswered prayer, we may not understand now but He sees what we cannot see! All we have to do is trust Him.

A soulmate is someone you can connect with spiritually, emotionally, mentally and intellectually and at the same get attracted to physically. That is the ideal partner!

Sweetheart, your beauty will attract him but to keep him you need more than that. To your beauty add character, intelligence and diligence; (in all) be a better person!

Don’t marry him or her because somebody you respect told you to. They won’t live with that person for you, you are the one who will. Make your choice wisely!

If he does not respect his mother, he’s never going to respect you and she’s going to respond to you the same way she responds to her father.  If his own parents cannot correct him, then “who are you?”  Fight it out now, don’t be fooled, “marriage changes no one”…

Sweetheart, no matter how angelic and “holyghostic” the person the vision came from, I don’t care if it was passport photograph you saw before proposing to her or before accepting his proposal, you need to understand that there is a place of working it out. God will not do for humans what humans should do (for him/herself). True love is achieved when two people deliberately and consciously decide to make it happen. You are not perfect so is your spouse. Work on your character and keep growing (together).

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Hi lovebirds,  can I please borrow a little bit of your time?
There is more to love than candle light dinners,  going to picnics together,  getting matching wristwatches and shirts, going to cinemas and all the other emotional stuffs.  Hey,  don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying its bad, it’s good. It’s shows how much you care but there is more to love. True love is about growing together, learning together, working towards achieving the same goal and then celebrating success together.

Only humans possesses side mirrors to check cars coming behind God does not. You know why? Because in God’s kingdom there is no reverse, He only looks forward to the good you are doing now (the present)…. Don’t hold on to the past when God has already forgiven you, God is not mad at you. So move on!

Sweetheart, being fulfilled should not come from your spouse, please get a life! Your spouse is meant to complement you not redesign you! Don’t wait for your partner before you do something let him meet you doing something let her meet you fulfilling your dreams…

Can you please stop nagging and complaining, try to compliment him and pray for him, he’s not perfect, you are neither. Treat him like a king!

Sweetheart, you were created for so much more, stop living a shallow life, inside you is a great woman, a woman with ideas that will turn the world around. Find the real you. You were designed to excel.

If you are one of those who has this long list of what you expect from your partner, let me ask you a question, how many of those qualities do you possess? Stop chasing the perfect person be the perfect person you want to chase. Invest in you and be a better person!

If he/she does not support your God, please do a rethinking, losing your God over a relationship is not worth it…

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7 Relationship Facts
1. Just because she comes to your house every weekend to do your laundries, she cooks good meals for you and she cleans your house, that does not guarantee a submissive wife she might just be talented in house chores…

2. God designed you to be her lord and king to protect her and move her to her promised land, He didn’t design you to boss her around and treat her like your maid servant, she is a queen and she deserves to be treasured treat her like a queen!

3. Just because you met him in church and he is a worker, does not mean he is broken…. Don’t just assume be very sure! Everyone is a saint in church…..

4. A good relationship consists of two givers, it is not only a man who should give, surprise him with gifts and encourage him…..

5. Stop looking for the perfect person, become the person you want to chase! Become a better person everyday….
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6. Don’t generalize your belief system, just because somebody broke your heart does not mean every other person you meet wants to hurt you, people are different!

7. This is the final fact, this goes for everybody whether single or engaged, don’t stop learning, build your intellect! Build your relationship with God! God dreams a bigger dream for you than you can ever imagine! You are created to excel don’t settle for less…

Posted in Author Onome, Digest, Inspirational Stories, Relationship

STOP IT!

Posted on by selahsomeonetotalkto

STOP IT!

“Are you not tired of being treated this way?” Esther asked Monica, both of them had been friends and roommates since their second year on campus, Esther had always been the gentle one; easy going, cool and calm while Monica on the other hand was the opposite. She is always excited, free and lively (loud). They are two different individuals who have different goals and ambitions. Esther’s very intelligent and quite smart; always trying hard to set Monica right, especially when it comes to relationship but often times she shuts her up and some times she shuts her out completely.

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This particular day had gotten Esther pissed off, her roommate came in to report her boyfriend Dave. Dave and Monica had been in a relationship for about a year but it had always been from one problem to another. Dave had never respected Monica and he had always treated her like she was one random girl. This particular day Monica went to see him and he had embarrassed her in front of one of his female friends, he just pretended as if she was not there. He kept on talking to the lady as if Monica never existed. Monica walked out of his room with tears in her eyes. When she got home, she opened up to her friend Esther. Esther was used to her coming home and complaining about Dave all the time but she was getting tired of listening to the same story, so she had to voice out and asked her the daunting question, “are you not tired of being treated this way?”

Our actions or inactions, consciously or unconsciously gives people the idea of how to treat us. We give people the power to treat us the way they do. Show class and people will treat you with respect – Selah

Monica’s eyes lit up, she replied “What do you mean!?!”. “You need to stop it!”, Esther replied. Monica was confused “Stop what? You are confusing me”. Esther moved closer to her, held her two hands and looked into her eyes “You need to stop Dave from treating you like nobody, you are beautiful and you deserve the world, you need to stand up and find your worth, love is not selfish, love does not dishonor others! If he loves you he will treat you like a queen that you are”. Esther continued, “let me ask you? How has this relationship added to your life?” Monica was speechless, she knew she had made lots of mistakes in that relationship, she knew she was just enduring the relationship, she knew she had to stop it.

It was like those words set Monica free. She was able to summon courage to end the slavery she called relationship. She ended the relationship with Dave and worked hard on herself to became a better person. Over time Monica found true love, a man who treats her right, puts her first and shares her dreams.

“You are beautiful and you deserve the world, you need to stand up and find your worth, love is not selfish, love does not dishonor others! If he loves you he will treat you like a queen that you are” – Onome

Love is a sweet thing. Everyone’s desire is to meet the right person who will make them feel so special and feel on top of the world but there is more to love than candle light dinners, going on dates, getting matching wristwatches and shirts and all the emotional stuff. Love is about growing together, learning together and respecting each other. Stop forcing yourself on her, stop forcing yourself on him, you worth so much more! Stop  tolerating relationship, you are meant to be celebrated not tolerated  and until you know your worth nobody will see you as worthy. My dear reader, you need to stop chasing people and become a person worth chasing. Trust me, if you become a better person, you will attract the right person.  Make conscious efforts to be the Right and you will be someone’s Mr or Mrs Right. Overall, be a man or woman your partner will be proud to have.

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Finally, treat your partner the way you want them to treat you; stop disrespecting your partner in front of your friends, family, colleagues, classmates or clique. If you don’t value your partner nobody will, if you don’t respect him/her your friends won’t. Don’t be bossy, don’t be controlling, don’t dominate discussions, don’t be too protective, don’t become obsessed and remember, she is not your maid and neither is he your source of income. Relationship is meant to be an advanced partnership, both of you have to bring something to the table; you have to trust, respect, reach compromise, make sacrifices, forgive and above all love truly.

Love is achieved when two mature minds decide to make it work, it is never one sided. Love should start from you, if you don’t love You, nobody will. If you have found true love hold on to it, if you have not, be patient and while at it be a better person, true love will surely find you. You are meant to be celebrated and loved not to be managed!

Omodara Oluwabunmi Onome
Onomewrites@gmail.com